The Struggle - Part 2 (At Wits End)

If I was a smoker, I would have smoked a whole carton today. Seriously. To the point of having bald spots on my head. I wasn't planning for my last post to become a two parter, and now that I think about it since I have been posting again it has become a saga. What is going to happen next?
In my last post, I talked about what I feared to be the inevitable. And in all honesty, it is. What I fear isn't his dreams coming true, but just the opposite. I want for nothing more than for him to be happy, and to be where God wants him. I want nothing else! The truth is, I fear where his dreams are leading him. Am I making any sense? I didn't think so, this for me to vent. Thursday, the only reason I got all worked up was because after he made a comment about not being here in May, I assumed (always gets me in trouble) that meant the gears were turning and in full force ahead. I couldn't have been more wrong! He isn't even on Step 1, he is still on Pre-Step 1.
Read the next post the get the rest of the story